Tea Time

Counting my Blessings
By Dani Stobbs
I am, after much travelling, back in Estevan, and it feels good to be home I have to say. I think this is the worst I have ever had jet lag. Waking up at four in the morning wide awake is not my preference at all. But after a couple of days of early mornings, my awake time seems to have settled for 7 a.m. - although I'm sure that is subject to change.
Even though it feels great to be back in Estevan, I have been feeling a little like a lost soul. While being in England, I felt homesick for Estevan, and was looking forward to coming back to Estevan to my own apartment and to at least be walking distance from 'the fiancé'
Yet when I got back into town, even though I was relieved to be back, I am now facing my homesickness from England.
In the week and a half that I was there, I got used to having my Grandma in the same house, being able to hang out with my sister every day, or going over to my friend's house, rather than a once in a three month phone call.
Sometimes I wish that I could merge the two worlds together. Then I wouldn't have to have a feeling of no belonging at times, or the feeling of being all over the place, because both have their ways of feeling like home.
I have done two major moves in my life, which meant a complete transition of friends, schools and cultures. So they all, at one stage, felt like home.
I was born in the South of England, where everything in life was a rush. No-one seemed to have time to slow down and enjoy life. Everyone was here, there and everywhere. So when we moved to the North of England, where the pace of life was much slower, that was an adjustment in itself. We were dealing with having to leave old schools behind, and the comfort of knowing where you fit in; and now having to walk what seemed like the longest hallway in your new school, with people looking at you, especially when I spoke in my southern accent. I stood out like a sore thumb. A lot like I do now actually.
After 6 years of living there and finally being settled, and thinking that this is probably where I would like to live for the rest of my life, we moved again - not that I'm complaining at all.
Moving to Canada was a bit more of a confused transition than the move from South to North. We had the bigger cultural difference to contend with, as well as the easily detected English accent. Even the way we dressed was so much different, and the things we liked to eat were no longer accessible.
But despite the feeling of homesickness, and that it doesn't always feel good to feel sad or to miss people, I do have to admit that I should count myself very blessed to have all these different homes that am able to miss.
That I can go back home to three places in England and know that there are people there that I love, and that love me.
I'm just counting my blessings today, I hope you are too, Estevan!