Sexual intimacy is one of the strongest forms of communication in a relationship.
It requires us to totally open up to our partner; and to allow ourselves to be vulnerable. This means that our partner has to be someone we trust with our very life. I have this in William and he has this with me. It didn’t just happen, though. We had to totally work at it, and it only happens through open and honest communication, expressed with a heart that loves.
Intimate sexual relations are crucial to your relationship. It is a driving force that bonds you both together, when expressed with an absolute and honest love for each other. But what happens if you can’t have that deep type of intimacy?
William and I have been together for almost 27 years. About 15 years ago, William developed diabetes. As the disease progressed it created issues, sexually, in our relationship. Although it affected me, it really affected William and it affected our relationship. Also, for whatever reason, I have never had a strong sexual desire.
We have noticed that when we don’t make time for sexual intimacy, despite our setbacks, we find ourselves drifting apart over time. We get irritated with each other quicker. We argue more often over the silliest things.
Even though we know we love each other, we don’t feel it as often. Life together becomes more like living out our love through decisions, rather than desire. We just don’t feel as close.
We also realized that sexual intimacy in our relationship was important enough to make it a priority. We realized there are still things you can do intimately as a couple, even if it is not at the level you are accustomed to.
Because we had spent so much time developing other areas of our relationship, like communication, and allowing our love for each other to grow in those areas, we were able to adapt and cope.
There is nothing in your relationship that can’t be discussed and worked on, if you truly love each other. No matter where you are at in your journey together, take the time to talk about this area of your relationship.