After thinking about my process for coming up with ideas for this column I started to realize that often the types of activities I choose to do in my own family are shaped by my family’s “love languages”. Close to ten years ago I read the book “The 5 Love Languages” by Dr. Gary Chapman. I found it ground breaking and enlightening then and I still find it extremely applicable today.

The premise of the book is that people communicate and receive “love” in a mixture of primarily five different ways – called “love languages”. Reading the book I could instantly determine my top love languages and also those of my spouse and family. Today I’d like to share the first language and give you some ideas on how to incorporate family activities that will speak this “language” to those it’s important to in your life.

If words of affirmation is your language, compliments mean the world to you and hearing the words “I love you” are very important. Hearing the reasons behind those will do even more to make your heart soar. On the flip side, insults can be very damaging. If you have a member of your family that speaks this language here are some ideas to try:

Slip a little note into your child’s or spouses lunch box or use something to write “I love you” on their actual food.

Hide notes of affection throughout your house or in their belongings for them to find unexpectedly.

Keep a chalkboard where you can write things you love about your family members on the fly.

Trace the outline of one of your children and have everyone write words that describe them in the outline.

Keep a one-sentence journal where you write your best memory of each family member for that day and share it with him or her daily.

Remember that if your spouse or children’s languages are different than yours you will have to put in an effort to communicate love in their language but will be so worth it!